RAW 3/8/10 Fan Script by Todd Matthy

In this fan script, Shawn Michaels goes on a journey to learn the secrets of the Undertaker, Randy Orton challenges Legacy, and at long last after hearing the testimonies of WWE Champion John Cena and World Heavyweight Champion CM Punk, Sting decides who he’ll challenge at Wrestlemania XXVI. Read on.

  • Pre Tape. Earlier in the day in Death Valley. Shawn Michaels is talking on his cell phone wandering around the neighborhood.

Shawn (to his phone):

Yeah. I know man. But I got this strange invitation to come here. It’s worth a shot. I’ve got to find out the Undertaker’s secrets, it’s the only way I can end the streak and save my career. Yeah…okay I’ll keep you posted.

(Shawn hangs up.  He walks around until he comes across a biker bar and enters. The bar is bustling.)

Hostess:

Afternoon stranger, what brings you this way?

Shawn:

I have some questions. Does anybody know anything about the Undertaker?

(The bar falls silent)

Waitress:

Come with me…

(The waitress escorts Shawn to the darkest corner of the bar, where a man in a wide brimmed cowboy hat is nursing his drink.)

Waitress:

Hey. This guys looking for information about…him.

The Man:

Him? Yeah, I know’em. Been awhile since he been through. Toughest sumbitch I ever did see. Whole family like that. Never forget watchin’ him fight. Nothin’ hurt the guy. Hit’em with stools, pool cues, nothin’. Guy broke a glass over ‘is head sat straight up. Why you want to know?

Shawn:

I’m facing him in three weeks. What is his secret? How did he get like that?

The Man:

Askin’ wrong guy. There’s one guy you can ask though. Lives in that burned down funeral home on other side of town. Strange man only comes out at night. Hope that helps.

Shawn:

It does thank you. (Turns to the camera and whispers) weird.

  • Show begins. The Miz’s music hits and he enters the ring. He says the audience should not bother ordering Wrestlemania, because he has no opponent to challenge him for the U.S. title. Suddenly John Morrison’s music hits. Morrison tells his former partner that he’d be more than happy to face him at Wrestlemania. The Miz tells John he is not worthy of a title shot. Morrison says he’ll prove it tonight, knocks the Miz out of the ring, and challenges him to a match.
  • John Morrison over US Champion the Miz in a non-title match.
  • Backstage: Guest Host Criss Angel does a magic trick for the Bella Twins. Cut to commercial.
  • Legacy over Randy Orton in a handicap match.
  • Backstage: Criss Angel shows Santino a magic trick. Afterwards Chavo and Doink the Clown who ask for advice on how to make the Varsity Club disappear join them. Angel books them into a six-man tag team match.  Cut to commercial.
  • Pre Tape: Shawn Michaels approaches the burned down funeral home. He marvels at how decrepit it is.

Shawn:

Jeez. Anyone ever think of cleaning up this place.

(He enters and looks around)

Shawn cont.:

Hello? Anybody home? Anybody bother cleaning up this place?

Voice:

Heeeeellllloooooohhhhhh.

Shawn:

Wait a minute. I know that voice.

Voice:

Oooohhhh yes you do, Shawn Michaels. Ooooh yes you do.

(The source of the voice sneaks up behind Shawn. It is Paul Bearer.)

Shawn:

Ah. Ever thought of getting tan?

Paul:

Oooh Nooo. But, oh yes, I know what brings you to my funeral parlor, Shawn. You seek the secrets of the Undertaker.

Shawn:

How’d you know?

Paul:

I still watch Monday Night Raw. And I am willing to aid you in your queessttt.

Shawn:

You can?

Paul:

Ooohh yes.

Shawn:

Ok. What do I do? What do I need to do to defeat the Undertaker at Wrestlemania?

Paul:

Come. Follow me.

(Paul leads him away)

Shawn:

Have you ever thought of toning down that ghost thing?

Paul:

Noooo.

  • Jack Swagger, Shelton Benjamin, and Charlie Haas w/ Coach Jackie over Santino, Chavo, and Doink the Clown.
  • Evan Bourne over William Regal to qualify for Money in the Bank. Cut to Commercial.
  • Vince McMahon’s music plays and he swaggers to the ring. He grabs the microphone and calls out the Hart Dynasty. They come to the ring. Vince tells them they should thank their Uncle Bret because he got them to opportunity to get their jobs back. All they have to do is beat Vince’s dream team. The Hart Dynasty tells him to get the point and tell them whom they’re facing at Wrestlemania. Vince unveils his team, Batista and Kane.  Cut to Commercial.
  • Triple H calls out Sheamus and the two get into a brawl.
  • Eve, Gail Kim, and Kelly Kelly over Maryse, Alicia Fox, and Jillian when Eve makes Maryse submit.
  • Pre Tape: Paul Bearer has lead Shawn Michaels into the funeral parlor’s graveyard.

Paul:

Ooohh yesss, yes, we’re almost there Shawn Michaels almost at your first task.

(They stop near and empty coffin and a shovel)

Shawn:

Who’s in there?

Paul:

No one. For now.

Shawn:

Once again. Creepy.

Paul:

To defeat the Undertaker at Wrestlemania, one must not hide from the dark side one must embrace it. To beat the Undertaker you must become the Undertaker.

Shawn (puzzled):

Ok? How do I ‘become the Undertaker’?

Paul:

Dig. Dig. Dig.

(Shawn shrugs and starts begins digging)

Cut to Commercial.

  • Triple H confronts Sheamus. A match is set for Wrestlemania.
  • Backstage: Sting is heading toward the stage entrance. Cut to Commercial.
  • Sting’s music hits and he comes to the ring with a mic.

Sting:

You all know why I’m here, so I might as well get down to business. John Cena! Get out here!

(WWE Champion John Cena’s music hits and he comes to the ring. He takes a mic)

Cena:

Sting. Before you continue I just want to say that whatever your decision is I respect it. But, as much as I respect you Sting, if you choose to challenge me for the WWE title, I’m not gonna take it easy on you, I’m not gonna lie down to you. I’m gonna beat you. No matter how hard it is. I’m going to show you and show all these fans why I deserve to be and why I am the WWE Champion. If you pick me Sting, get ready because you’re in for one helluva fight.

Sting:

I expect nothing less. CM Punk, where are you?

(World Heavyweight Champion CM Punk’s music hits and he enters the ring)

CM Punk:

Blah. Blah. Blah. Don’t you have any other speeches Cena? You don’t. You have nothing. Sure, the kids love you and your ‘never give up’ attitude. But this white rapper thing…went out with Eminem. You’re a poser, not a leader and Sting in the main event of Wrestlemania, the fans want to see a leader. Which is why I’m out here. I don’t need to give some hackneyed speech straight out of a sports movie to prove I’m the better man, the World Heavyweight Championship, being straight edge, converting people to the straight edge lifestyle. I am a leader and a champion. I’ve got nothing to prove to you. You need to prove yourself to me.

Sting:

I’ve got nothing to prove to you either. I called you both out here because I have a decision to make. A decision that I’ve made, but it didn’t come easy. I’m standing in the ring with the top two athletes in the WWE. The WWE Champion John Cena, the World Heavyweight Champion CM Punk. No matter how you got there, you are the champions. You are the men to beat. And for weeks its been eating at me, I’ve been asking myself, ‘Stinger who are you going to face? What championship will you go for; the WWE Championship, the title eluded you your entire career or one more run with the World Heavyweight Championship, the most valuable prize in our sport since 1905? Who will you pick Sting? Who will you pick?’ Then something occurred to me. I remembered the reason why I came to the WWE. I came here to prove I was the best and I realized something, no matter whom I choose, no matter what title I win, I will be considered the best. If I beat Cena the fans will say ‘what about Punk?’ If I beat you Punk they’ll all say ‘what about Cena?’ And I realized something, I can never be the best, because there will be another champion. At Wrestlemania XXVI, Triple Threat! It’s going to be Sting challenging John Cena for the WWE title! It’s going to be Sting against CM Punk for the World Heavyweight title! And at the end there will be only one!

Cena:

You’re on!

CM Punk:

I accept.

Sting:

Then at Wrestlemania, it’s Showtime.

Show ends.

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