I’m starting to enjoy doing these. It makes me feel like a kid playing with his wrestling figures all over again. I know this weeks edition is a little late (fear not it’s not a rehash of what happened on the actual show.)  but that’s because I had a little help. This episodes hostess is Lauren Jones, and she actually contributed a few ideas to the script, including a heartfelt farewell to announcer Lillian Garcia. Pretty cool.

Check out her website, with information on her new shoe line here. Now enjoy….

RAW- 9/06/09- by Todd Matthy and Lauren Jones

1. Recap of Last week’s show. Introduction. Lillian Garcia is in the middle of the ring.

Lillian:

Please welcome your host for this week…Lauren Jones!

(Lauren takes the mic)

Lauren:

Hello WWE UNIVERSE!!!!!!!!! It’s great to be back. I just talked to sooo many people I haven’t seen in years. I’ve also noticed a bunch of new faces backstage!

(DX Music hits. Triple H, Shawn Michaels, and X-Pac come to the ring)

Triple H (putting his arm around Lauren):

Hi Lauren, long time no see.

Lauren:

Hi Hunter, Shawn.

XPac (extending his hand, Lauren takes it):

I don’t believe we’ve met. I’m Sean. You might know me as X Pac, Syxx, 123 Kidd…

Lauren:

Chyna’s boyfriend (He throws up his arms in guilt)

XPac:

We don’t talk about that…

Shawn:

Lets move away from Sean’s love life, as sad as it is, we came out here for a reason…(Looks down and catches a glimpse of Lauren’s shoes.) nice shoes.

Lauren:

Thank you. I made them.

Triple H:

Really? Those wouldn’t look to bad on Steph right Shawn?

Shawn:

Better then you do…(Triple H smirks)

Triple H:

Heh. Heh. At least I know the proper use for socks.

Shawn:

Ok. Ok. But all joking aside, we’ve got a problem.

Triple H:

A HART problem.

XPac:

And since we’ve got a pay-per-view coming up…

Triple H:

Where you have to make your opponent say ‘I Quit’…

Shawn:

And its in Montreal (pause for crowd reaction)…I had a little incident there. Anyway were wondering if you could give Hunter and I a chance to perform…a little HART surgery on Sunday?

Lauren:

Well, what will you do for me?

(Shawn and XPac hoist her up)

Triple H:

Get your Lauren Jones designer shoes available online at laurenjonescollection.com and at fine shoe stores anywhere.

(They put her down)

Lauren:

Well…since you’re kind enough to complement my shoes, not only am I going to grant your match for Sunday, I’m going to let the three of you get your hands on the Hart Dynasty tonight. And I’ll throw a little Cody Rhodes in there for good measure. And if you’re not with that I got two words for you…(points mike at the crowd)

(DX’s music hits and they clear the ring)

2. Backstage: Locker room. Cody Rhodes and Randy Orton confront Ted DiBiase Jr. about his match with Randy later that night.

Rhodes:

Hey.

Orton:

Ted, just the man I wanted to see.

DiBiase:

What’s up?

Orton:

Now, I know you think tonight is your big opportunity for a shot at John Cena and the WWE title. And it’s a great opportunity, don’t get me wrong, but I just want to know we’re on the same page.

DiBiase:

What are you talking about?

Orton:

I’m just making sure you’re going to “do the right thing?”

DiBiase:

Yeah, I’m gonna do the right thing and I’m not gonna lay down.

DiBiase walks off, much to Orton’s dismay.

3. Diva action:

Kelly Kelly, Gail Kim, and Mickie James over Beth Phoenix, Rosa Mendes, and Jillian. Kelly pins Beth after a rocket launcher from Gail and Mickie.

Cut to Commercial.

4. Backstage: Gail and Mickie are congratulating Kelly on her improvement over the past couple of weeks. Lauren enters, congratulates them on their win, and asks if she can speak with them privately. Santino enters dressed like Ron Burgundy.

Santino:

Veronica. It is I, Ronald McBurgundy. In case you don’t know, I’m kinda big deal.

Lauren:

I wasn’t in that movie.

Santino:

What are you talking about Veronica?

Lauren:

No, that was Christina Appelgate.  I was in Spider-Man 3. (Santino draws a blank) Guiding Light? (Santino draws another blank) The Price is Right? Anchorwoman.

Santino:

Ah yes…it on DVD?

Lauren:

Not yet, but someday….anyway, it’s a pleasure to meet you and you know what…lets do the news later tonight.

5. Shelton Benjiman and Charlie Haas w/ Miss Jackie over Low-Ki and Evan Bourne when Jackie hits Borne with a weight bar.

6. Lauren is talking with the Bella Twins, Maria, and Melina about a ‘surprise’ she has planned for later. The Miz approaches Lauren.

The Miz:

Lauren Jones. You were an Anchorwoman. You want a breaking news piece?

Lauren:

Sure.

The Miz:

The Miz is going to squash Kofi Kingston in the tournament final and then he’s going to take Jack Swagger’s US title, because I am the Mizzzzzzzz, and I am awesome!

Lauren:

Well good luck.

Cut to Commercial.

7. US Title Tournament Final. US Champion Jack Swagger comes out commentate.

The Miz over Kofi Kingston.

8.  Backstage, Lauren and Santino (dressed as Ron Burgundy) sit behind a mock news desk.

Lauren:

Don’t be nervous…it’s your first time. You should have seen me when I started…

Producer:

We’re on in 5. 4. 3. 2….

Lauren:

Good Evening everyone I’m Lauren Jones…

Santino:

And I’m Santino Marella.

Lauren:

Welcome to the RAW Evening News.

Santino:

Fine weather we are having this morning, aren’t we Laura?

Lauren:

Santino, it’s Lauren and we’re doing the evening news.

Santino:

Oh yes, my bad.

Lauren:

Our top story tonight is President Obama’s Message to America’s children on the first day of school. He encouraged them to look up to positive role models like Bill Gates…

Santino:

And to watch out for bad influences like Santino Marella, who thinks the President is nothing but a big eared, phony baloney, that wasn’t…

Lauren:

Santino! Santino! What are you doing?

Santino:

Reading the news of the evening.

Lauren:

Stick to the prompter.

Santino:

I am.

Lauren:

What? Let me see…

(Lauren and Santino glare at Santino’s prompt. There eyes widen.)

Lauren:

What the?

(The Producer reveals himself to be Chavo Guerrero, who laughs at Santino and darts off)

Santino:

Chavo! (Santino gives chase. Lauren is baffled)

Lauren:

And that’s the news.

Cut to DX (Triple H, Shawn Michaels, and X-Pac heading towards their match)

Cut to Commercial.

9. DX over the Hart Dynasty and Cody Rhodes.

10. Mark Henry over Chris Jericho, when MVP stops the Big Show from interfering.

11. The Miz confronts Lauren back stage.

Miz:

Did you see that?

Lauren:

Yeah, Mark Henry just pinned Chris Jericho. That’s quite a victory.

Miz:

No! Did you see me, The Miz, with his hand raised, victoriously awarded the US Title.

Lauren:

But, you didn’t win the title.

Miz:

Not yet, but it’s a given…sort of like you and me after the show.

Lauren:

What?

Miz:

Don’t deny it. You’ve had your eyes on me all night.

Lauren:

Actually I…

Miz:

You loved it when I gave Kofi Kingston a reality check…

Lauren:

No, not at…

Miz:

You love me because I am the Mizzzzzzzz…

Lauren:

And you have no game.

Miz:

What?

Lauren:

You heard me.

Miz:

Your loss.

Lauren:

Not a big one.

The Miz walks off disappointed. The Divas arrive and tell Lauren they are ready for the big “surprise”.

Cut to Commercial.

12. Lauren and the Divas come down the ramp, carrying flowers and balloons. Lauren takes the mic.

Lauren:

Hey everyone!!!!!!!!! I’m having a great time, are you? Good, because we have a special surprise for a very special person. A person with an incredible voice, a body to die for and most importantly, a sweet person with a kind heart who was not only nice to me…but every single one of these Divas. Lillian, would you come to the ring?

(Lillian enters. The Divas cover her in flowers, balloons, and a tiara)

Lauren:

Lillian, on behalf of the Divas and the WWE Universe, we’d like to say thank you. Thank you for being a role model to all of us. And thank you for the memories. But we’re not done yet…. we heard somebody was getting married, not only am I throwing you a bachelorette party, but all the bridal shoes, and the bridesmaids shoes are ON ME!

(Several Chippendales come to the ring baring Lauren Jones Bridal Shoes, and champagne. They bow to each Diva, put the shoes on them like in “Cinderella”, and pour them drinks. Next, the Chippendales wheel a cake ringside. They open the top and Big Dick Johnson emerges and dances with Lillian and the Divas, who are all laughing and enjoying themselves. Confetti falls)

Confetti falls and we cut backstage.

13.  Orton and DiBiase prepare for their match.

Cut to Commercial.

14. WWE Title Final. John Cena comes out and does commentary.

Randy Orton over Ted DiBiase Jr. via DQ when Bret DiBiase interferes on “his brother’s behalf”.

Want more Lauren? Check out these Pics..

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Comments
  1. James says:

    Love the Lauren Jones photos! What a great script! I hope WWE uses it because it would be a great show! Thanks for sharing and looking forward to future updates!

  2. [...] out a couple of my fan scripts including my collaboration with former WWE Diva Lauren Jones right here or scroll through my website, Sledgehammer Productions. [...]

  3. [...] if I need a reason, Lauren Jones was kind enough to help me write a fan script a month back. Judging by it’s traffic, you all seem to like it and since we all love her, I [...]

  4. [...] a former WWE Diva who helped create a RAW Fan Script. She’s also a sweetheart who’s conquering everything from movies to fashion. So what [...]

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